😞

I don’t know how to communicate this really. Today you were very critical of everything. I could let most of it go, but then you were attacking me and making negative assumptions about my future decision making. It just really hurts to know that’s how you think and feel about me. I wish you could learn to think better of me. 

There’s such so much hypocrisy. You criticized Kieu for inviting herself to the baptism, but Trang invited herself to your trip. You asked what’s Trang supposed to say to Kieu. What are the wives supposed to say to you? I’m sure they could say no, but it puts them in an awkward position. It’s none of my business, but I just wanted to point out your different reactions for similar situations.

I know I comment about life insurance and your house, but I want you to know that I’m just joking with you. And I want to make it very clear now, I don’t want you to get life insurance for me. I understand that I may have gotten it with you and a future family, but that doesn’t mean I have the right to expect you to reciprocate. That’s not why I got the policy. I just wanted to make sure that if I’m gone, our family would have something to help ease any burdens (even though I know you’re capable of taking care of yourself). As for your house, I have always and will always refer to it as your house. I only expect to live here as long as we’re together. Should you pass on before me, I’ll be fine finding another place to live. And I’ll be okay taking care of our family without your life insurance. So I don’t want you holding it against me that you got life insurance because I made you. Please cancel it now if you feel that way.

The other thing that makes me sad is how stubborn you are about being independent sometimes. We formed a union, before God and our loved ones. I’m not asking you to rely on me for everything, but it’s a slap in the face when you make it seem like you don’t need me. Just so you know, I don’t really need you either, but when I joined this relationship, I set aside some of myself so I could make room for you and us. Imagine how you’d feel if I told you I didn’t need you. I wish you’d see us as more of a team, especially if you want to start a family.

I don’t really like writing about negative things, but I just wanted to get this out there formally. So there’s no debate about what was said or not said. Speaking of which, you never commented/acknowledged/apologized for how you made me feel today. But if you don’t feel you did anything wrong or my reaction was unwarranted, then it is what it is. But if you do feel like you made a mistake you should at least acknowledge it. That’s something I feel like you never do. You just are quiet and ignore it. It doesn’t go away. I really don’t want to cause you stress or anguish since you’re pregnant, but if you didn’t already know all this I need you to know it now rather than later. I know relationships aren’t always easy, but I just wish this didn’t have to be the hard part. Maybe I expect too much. ATEN still!!